Monday, January 11, 2010

An Unintentional Feminist Critique of Marriage

This morning:
Viva: Why can’t chickens fly?

Mama: Their wings are too small for their bodies.* So even though they’re birds, they can’t fly.

Viva: Oh, like bees! Bees really shouldn’t be able to fly but they do, even though their bodies are so big and their wings are so small.

Mama: Yeah, that’s right. They say that it should be impossible for bees to fly.

Viva: I’m glad I’m not a bee. They only live for three days, you know.

Mama: Yes, I do remember hearing that somewhere.

Viva: Yeah, one time? I was at M’s house and this bee did not like him, and every time he would go outside this bee would go after him. And after three days, like on the third day? The bee started slowing down because it was dying you know? And you know what M did? He buried it!

Mama: Really? I don’t think I’ve heard this story before.

Viva: Yeah, he took a cough drop box and he put the bee in it and then he dug a hole and he put the bee in the box in the hole and then he had a funeral for it? He sang like this: “Duh duhn da da…”

Takes a minute to realize that Viva (and/or her cousin) apparently believes that the “Here Comes the Bride” song is funeral music. Hilarious.

* Because they’ve been selectively bred to be extra-big in the breast for human eating purposes. Kind of gross when you think about it.


Bridget said...

Your post reminds me of Liz Phair's song "Polyester Bride". I always took that one as a feminist critique of marriage, too.

PS Don't you just LOVE when kids ramble and tell you all their stories? It doesn't get any better than that. So glad you shared!

Cee in SF said...

Wild story! I loved it!