The Art of Conversation

A sampling of recent Viva conversations...

FUNNY

Setup: after fighting sleep for over an hour and screaming loudly throughout, Viva finally succumbed and slept through the night, waking up at nearly 8 AM and calling for me to come get her.

Me [picking her up]: Good morning, baby. You slept a long time.

Viva: Yeah, long time. [suddenly remembers, points to the crib:] I was scared!

Me [confused]: You were scared? What are you scared of?

Viva: I was screaming!

Me [realize she is talking about the night before]: Yeah, you were, I was there. It was loud!

Viva: Loud.

Me: What scared you? Are you scared of the dark?

Viva [frowns]: No.

Me: I mean, does it scare you when it's dark?

Viva: Yes...[looks confused, then:] I was screaming!

Me: Yeah, I know. Something scared you?

Viva [nods]: Screaming scares me.

Me [starting to laugh]: Your own screaming scares you?

Viva [laughing too, yells]: YEAH!

CUTE

Setup: We were supposed to meet our friends, Carolyn and Lucy, at the park at 10:30 this morning. We arrived at the park around 10:20, at which point Viva began to tell me she wanted to go home. She reiterated this point on the swings, on the slide, and in the sandbox. Finally, at around 11:00, I gave in, figuring Lucy must still be napping and we wouldn't be seeing them that day. Later, as I was snuggling Viva before her nap, we had the following exchange:

Viva: I play Lucy. I play Lucy. I play Lucy.

Me: Yeah, you wanted to play with Lucy, but she was sleeping. She was taking a nap when we were at the park. We'll play with her sometime soon.

Viva: Oh. [pause, then confidingly] I like Ca'lyn, too.

IMPOSSIBLE TO CATEGORIZE/POSSIBLY TOO GRAPHIC

Setup: I have just finished taking a shower and I am in the bathroom drying off and getting dressed. Viva is also in the bathroom, picking up Cheerios from the floor where she has dropped them and talking to me. She looks up as I am inserting a tampon.

Viva: You put in your bum-bum?

Me [trying desperately not to laugh]: WHAAAAT??? Nooooo, baby!

At which point, I lose the battle and we both just laugh and laugh, although she has no idea why. Oh my Gawd. It is too much!