Wednesday, November 16, 2005


So yesterday, Sweet William had to be at work at 7 AM for some clients who didn't show until 9 AM. Sweet. I love entertainment industry types. He was then supposed to get out of work early. At about 4:15, as I was struggling haplessly with my blog un-design, he walked in the door and said: "Where's the baby?"

D'oh to the nth degree!

It's not that I had forgotten her, Dear Reader. I actually don't have to pick her up until 4:30 if I want. It's just that with the Daylight Savings Time, I've been going to pick her up earlier because it gets darker/colder earlier. (Why, yes, I realize we are in Los Angeles, but it does not remain 75 degrees every day when the sun goes down. Sometimes it goes down into the 50s! Why am I sensing a lack of appreciation for this from those of you in colder climes? I paid my dues, people. Twenty-six years in the Northeast! Waiting for buses and trains in the snow -- whew, don't get me started. I've earned my right to frolic in the sun.) (Why, good heavens, I have certainly gone off on a tangent there. So, so sorry.)

But what I'm saying is that due to my agonizing blog issues, I lost track of time. And I'm sorry that my blog still looks like crap, albeit a different kind of crap. I am in the throes of designing my own blog header, and it is not something that you can learn overnight. Particularly when, overnight, you're doing things like sleeping. And then when you get up, you are doing things like getting your kid dressed and fed and trying to get some exercise and paying bills and trying to find a job. So I'm not making excuses. Okay, so maybe I am. So?

My point, and I do have one, is that I really do enjoy this blog, so much so that I lose track of time. So glad you're here with me on this rickety ride. Strap in!

Everything's Ungodly!

WOW! If you did not get to see the two-part version of Trading Spouses, you missed some fine reality TV. This was the one with the "liberal/New Age" mom (Jeanne D'Amico Flisher) trading places with the extreme Christian mom (Marguerite/Margaret Perrin), resulting in one of the most incredible meltdowns ever captured on film.

The highest bid on the Marguerite Perrin talking bobblehead doll on EBay is currently $660, and you need to go and take a look at it, because they have only made one, and if you click on the picture, they have put together a slew of sound bites set to some music that sounds like it was composed on a Casio. It is fan-frickin'-tastic. Quoting from the site:

The bobblehead doll has been sculpted from polymer clay and hardened. Her head actually wobbles! Doll has been hand painted with acrylic paints and is coated in a durable clear gloss finish. She's dressed in a real cloth "moomoo" [sic]black dress and shirt. She even has a real beaded necklace with silver medalion [sic]like the one she was wearing during her "meltdown" on the show. ...

The bobblehead sits on a base which contains the sound unit and features actual clips of Marguerite's meltdown from the show. Clips have been recorded from a direct line from the t.v. [sic] audio to ensure the best possible sound quality. Play, fast-forward, and rewind buttons are exposed for playback of the sound clips from the small speaker to the right of her. The sound recording unit's "record" button has been removed so that you don't have to worry about accidently [sic]recording over her voice.

This talking bobblehead of the Crazy God Warrior say [sic] the following quotes:

I don't want someone with tainted...anything in beliefs, doing anything with my family!
Their entire house is darksided too!
Everything's un-Godly!
Gargoyles!... Psychics!
Get the hell out of my house - in Jesus' name I pray!
I give it up to God, I'm a GOD WARRIOR!
She's not a CHRISTIAN!
She was tampering in darksided stuff!
This is tainted - I don't want it. Whatever it is, it's tainted!
I want nothing. I want my God and I want my family!
I want NO Money!

Whew! I need to sit down. My only problem with this is that I didn't think of it first. I fully admit to adopting what I feel is the classic Marguerite Perrin quote and having used it freely since I saw the show, to wit:

Driving down the street looking for a parking space in front of Viva's school.
Mama Blah: Aha! I got a space! Because I AM A GOD WARRIOR!

Phone is ringing. Caller ID indicates that it is some sort of telemarketing company.
Mama Blah: I'm not answering that. Because I AM A GOD WARRIOR! Telemarketing is DARK-SIDED!

Oh, it might be wrong, but it feels so right.

EDITED TO ADD: Oh my God! That music IS recorded on a Casio. Check it out!

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