While out with her daddy yesterday morning, Viva stepped in poo. Sweet William brought her home and put the offending shoes out on the balcony, with every intention (I am SURE) of cleaning up the shoes eventually.
Said shoes are fairly new K-Swiss knockoffs from Target, and technically, they are at least a half-size too small.* The motivation to deal with prying the dried poo off the shoes and cleaning them off is, in my case, very small. I just passed by the balcony and they're still sitting out there, shit-stained and fancy-free.
It seems clear to me that the most logical thing to do is to go buy new shoes and completely ignore the shitty shoes. They are now officially Outcast.
* Viva got her feet measured on Friday, and scored a new pair of shoes on the spot from the chi-chi kids' shoe store in Larchmont Village. She is now wearing another half-size larger. We have been meticulous about measuring her feet because every now and then we realize she has red marks on her feet because she's outgrowing her shoes. So now, it appears, we need to get her measured every 4 months or so. You know, kids are expensive. Have I mentioned this?